Monthly Archives: June 2012

What’s My Age Again?


The Girl, annoyed with her brother after he asked her about a video game: “Please, Sam. I’ve been playing that game since I was 8. And I’ve been 8 since 2007.”

She was 6 in 2007. Math was never her forte.

Why Would Carly Rae Jepsen Like Whipped Cheese?


The Boy, singing along to “Call Me Maybe”: “Your stare was holding. Whipped cheese. Skin was showing.”

Me: “Did you just say, “whipped cheese?”

The Boy: “Yeah. Why? What is it?”

The Girl: “It’s ‘ripped jeans’.”

The Boy: “I was wondering why she would want whipped cheese.”

*The Boy & I have to do the Harvard Baseball Team car dance whenever this song comes on. The Girl thinks we’re idiots.

A Rule’s a Rule


The Boy’s class was discussing rules & why we have them. They were asked to illustrate some of the rules they follow every day.

Here is The Boy’s contribution:

“Don’t go outside after dark. Dinosaurs will get you.”

“Don’t go hand to hand combat with a ghost.”

Words to live by.

Hello, Dolly.


The Boy: “Abby told me this scary story about a doll that gets a knife & kills this little girl. At first I was really scared but there’s no way that really happened. Know how I know?”

Me: “How do you know?”

The Boy: “Dolls don’t have opposable thumbs. No way that doll could grab a knife with her little nub hands.”

Is the Glass Half Empty or Are You a Moron?


The Doctor: “Gotta wash my hands, because you’re important.”

The Boy: “I’m important? Oh, right. Without  us patients, you doctors wouldn’t make any money.”

The Doctor: “Well, that’s certainly pessimistic.”

Me: “No. That’s cynical.”