I’ve put off writing this, as if not writing it will make it not happen; as if writing it will make it final.
My big sister is moving away. Far away. 2,657 miles away. But who’s counting.
Her husband is being transferred & she’s obviously going with him. Because that’s what you do. I’ve gotten used to seeing her every day. She helped me get the job that let me be home this Thanksgiving & away from my previous position that entailed catering to massive amounts of people who are willing to throw elbows to get merchandise at low, low prices. She also introduced me to the boyfriend that waited patiently through my crazy days to earn that title. So, with her work here done, she’s jetting off.
And I can’t begin to express how sad it makes me.
The yin to my yang. The Shirley to my Laverne. We’ve always been opposites and yet more alike than we care to admit. She, the cheerleader & chorus singer & tiny brunette. Me, the drama geek & marching band member & not so tiny blonde. She was always more fashionable than me, declaring on more than one occasion that she would “not walk to school with her looking like that!” Which was met with me wondering what was wrong with wearing a butterfly print shirt with a plaid sweater vest – at least one of which was inside out.
She’s the only one who knows what it was like to grow up with our parents – the good & the bad. We know each others secrets & we’ve covered for each other when we were out doing things we shouldn’t be. More recently, we’ve spent daily lunch hours planning family events & nights out & bitching about things that were pissing us off. She is my closest confidante & best friend. Her children give me hope for my own kids. (They are two of the brightest & funniest humans I’ve ever met.)
After several weeks of goodbye shindigs – one from her husband’s firefighter friends, one from our office, one last couples night out & a family gathering, we finally said a last farewell as they get set to fly out. She’s going somewhere where she knows nobody. I can’t imagine how intimidating that must be. I hugged her & told her she was going to be alright. In typical big sister fashion she said, “And so are you.”
Perhaps I will be. But I won’t be the same.