Me: 40-something-ish newly divorced, single mom, retail manager & blogger. Obsessed with ampersands, Foo Fighters & chardonnay.
The Girl: 11-year-old middle-schooler, avid reader, Minecrafter & future novelist.
The Boy: 8-year-old Lego genius, video game enthusiast & artist with a way-too-big vocabulary.
The Ex: Dad to The Girl & The Boy & my ex-husband. Engineer-ish, “let’s-do-calculus-for-fun,” kind of guy.
The Joan: My Mom. Ready to help & give advice, wanted & unwanted, at a moments notice. Has a fierce ability to ask the same question in so many different ways as to distract her prey into agreeing with what she wants. I’d be lost without her.
The Joan & Tony Show: The collective name of my mom & step dad. Often shortened to simply, “The Show,” as in, “Hey – is The Show there yet? I’m running late & don’t need to get The Jaw.”
The Jaw: Not a person, just a look that The Joan has passed down to The KK & Me. It’s hard to describe but picture someone looking at you in a way that says, “You’re a complete idiot.”
The KK: My sister. Aunt to The Boy & The Girl. Godmother of The Girl. The one person I can call when the only response I want to hear is, “You’re completely right & they’re a complete idiot. Give them The Jaw.”
The Hyde: My BFF & former college roommate. The person I go to when I need my ass kicked or when I need to hear the brutal truth. Has the unique ability to give me the brutal truth without making me feel like a complete idiot.