Please Don’t Let Him Be a Lawyer

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The Boy, defending himself after losing his new Samsung tablet: “I didn’t lose it. I just put it somewhere I don’t remember.”

Me: “You’ll make a great lawyer someday.”

The Boy: “Yeah… ‘Your Honor, my client didn’t stab that guy. He just misplaced a knife in his head.'”

Me: “That’s lovely.”

The Boy: “Your honor… my client didn’t strangle that woman. He was simply hugging her…. tightly… around the neck.”

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